Assisting Britney
February 20th 2007 03:00
Could she possibly lose anything else?!
Poor Britney has lost her husband, her career, at times her knickers, her trademark tresses and now this tragic pop princess has lost her personal assistant as well. 1.2.3.... Awwwwww.
In a letter leaked to a popular gossip blog, Britney's assistant had this to say:
I cherish ALL the incredible opportunities that came my way thru my job with Britney and am crushed/saddened/heart sick by the way her life is unfolding…There’s just so much you can do to help a person - I don’t dare want to be an enabler, and I cannot love her enough for the both of us. I cannot convince her in ANY way to love herself. I’m so Southern, and the BEST way for me to tell you how I feel is to say - You can just kick an old Dog so many times before he gets off the porch,” she wrote. I, FELICIA, am OFF the porch!!”
In an effort to help poor Britney in her time of need I have written a help wanted ad for her new personal assistant.
“Wanted: Personal Assitant. Must be available 24 hours a day for McDonald’s runs and last minute trips to Vegas. Candidate must understand the fine art of Cheetos smacking and table dancing. Must be willing to feed small children and clean up vomit. Salary: not nearly enough.”
Poor Britney has lost her husband, her career, at times her knickers, her trademark tresses and now this tragic pop princess has lost her personal assistant as well. 1.2.3.... Awwwwww.
In a letter leaked to a popular gossip blog, Britney's assistant had this to say:
I cherish ALL the incredible opportunities that came my way thru my job with Britney and am crushed/saddened/heart sick by the way her life is unfolding…There’s just so much you can do to help a person - I don’t dare want to be an enabler, and I cannot love her enough for the both of us. I cannot convince her in ANY way to love herself. I’m so Southern, and the BEST way for me to tell you how I feel is to say - You can just kick an old Dog so many times before he gets off the porch,” she wrote. I, FELICIA, am OFF the porch!!”
In an effort to help poor Britney in her time of need I have written a help wanted ad for her new personal assistant.
“Wanted: Personal Assitant. Must be available 24 hours a day for McDonald’s runs and last minute trips to Vegas. Candidate must understand the fine art of Cheetos smacking and table dancing. Must be willing to feed small children and clean up vomit. Salary: not nearly enough.”
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Comment by nayomee77
Soo weird cause i am really craving a cheeseburger...then read that.